I saw a post from somebody I’m not entirely keen on, stating that they believe in promoting self respect for women, and their way of doing so is ridiculing, mocking, insulting or criticising women, specifically young mothers, for posting scantily clad or sexually provocative photographs on their personal IG accounts. This person has previously posted fully nude photographs of themselves online in their bathtub, which I see nothing wrong with in itself, after criticising others for doing similar things. I think, and I’m trying to be as objective as I can here, if you’re going to ”promote self respect in women”, hypocritically criticising them for displaying themselves and their bodies to the world or their friends however they like is fairly counter-productive. That’s basically saying “Women should have self respect which means covering yourself up and restricting your personal freedom of expression, because a woman who shows some skin, however provocative couldn’t possibly respect herself as a woman, I mean a man with an overcharged libido might see that and be incapable of controlling himself! It’s okay if I do it though because I’m not a mother, and I don’t have to practise what I incessantly preach!” If that’s how you believe self respect for women should be, in terms of showing less skin and having more “decency” then well that’s your belief, maybe I don’t entirely agree with it but you’re entitled to it nonetheless. HOWEVER, if you’re going to preach that, and use it as a weapon against women who haven’t actually done anything wrong to you personally, and then do the exact same thing as them whilst still preaching it, I don’t believe you even have the right to claim you’re doing so for the sake of promoting self respect. What that really is, is using that term as a scapegoat for unkind and rude behaviour, and subsequently degrading the term itself.
10 BETTER BODY AFFIRMATIONS FOR YOUNG WOMEN
1. Your body is in flux for the rest of your life. Think of your body as fluid instead of static — it’s always going to change. So get comfortable with those changes.
2. No one will love you or not love you because of your body. You are lovable because you’re you, not because your body looks a certain way.
3. The most intensely personal relationship you’ll ever have is with your body. It’s a lifelong relationship that’s well worth investing in and nurturing the same way you would with loved ones.
4. You don’t owe your body to anyone. Not sexually, not aesthetically. Your body is yours. Period.
5. What someone else says about your body says more about them than it does about you. Look past the actual snark to the person who’s saying it, because it’s only a reflection of what they think of themselves. That’s when you’ll see how little power their words have.
6. Your body is not a reflection of your character. It’s a physical home for the complex and wondrous and unique being that is you.
7. Take up as much space as you want. You don’t have to be small, or quiet, or docile, regardless of your physical size.
8. Everything you need to accept your body is already inside you. There’s no book, or diet, or workout routine or external affirmation that you need to feel good about your body right now.
9. Your body is a priority. It’s always trying to tell you things. Taking the time to listen to is of the utmost importance.
10. Wear whatever you want. Your body shape does not dictate your personal style, and fashion rules that say otherwise are wrong. Dress yourself in a way that makes you feel happy and confident and beautiful, because guess what? You are.
This is one of the reasons I spend so much time on my appearance, it never has been and never will be to attract or impress others; I spend time on my appearance because I find it fun, because my body is my home and I very much enjoy decorating my home and then re decorating, because instead of being verbally open with who I am to everybody, instead of having a loud, bubbly and out there personality, all of that energy you can see on my skin, in my hair, in the holes in my ears and some day the metal in my face and the clothes that I wear. I spend so much time on my appearance because to me it is more than just my appearance, it is my body, MY body, it is my home and it is most importantly an ever changing embodiment of me.